Tag: holidays

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Media Consumption other things Whimsy Writing Life

Good Christmas

It was a good Christmas. I say that every year, even the year Mom died, even the year my best friend was dying, even the year Spouseman was waiting on cancer news, because every year–even the bad years when one or both of us was grieving or wrestling with illness or more–every year there’s been something good about the day to remember. This year there were far more goods than average despite it being Pandemic HellWorld Year Take 2.

We slept in, ate cinnamon rolls, opened presents, and then Spouseman went to game for a bit and I sat in the sunshine near the fireplace and wrote a thousand words about nitrile gloves & why I love them, which might be a boring way to spend Christmas afternoon, but it was comfy and cozy and I enjoyed it immensely. There was also a great deal of cat photography and some family texting, so I wasn’t a total hermit.

On the material side, I received an abundance of socks & can’t wait to wear them. Spouseman’s various Kickstarters and other online adventures brought me tarot cards and tea dragon plushies, plus a Practical Witch’s Almanac that I can’t wait to use all year long. He is loving his PS5 (no, I did not buy it scalped, I got it normal retail, plus accessories) and insists he is not disappointed even though it’s literally the only thing I got him. So I’m happy about that.

Santa didn’t bring me any sales or book reviews, (almost all authors love the gift of new readers, I’m pretty sure that’s a True Fact) but I forgot to send my letter to Santa about that, so the continued drought of sales was hardly a surprise. Maybe next year is the year I’ll suddenly and without explanation make enough money from a title to join SFWA. Or sell two short stories I haven’t written yet. Or maybe it won’t be. I’ll keep plugging away at projects either way.

ANYway. In case it isn’t clear, this is my way of recording thoughts I would usually scatter piecemeal across social media. Writing down what happens in my head and in my life helps things stick in my sievelike memory, so…here we are.

n with the day. Eventually we went out for a walk in the sunshine and the weather was so crisp, still, & clear that we impulsively decided to have a fire outside when we got back. The temp dropped hard as soon as the sun set, but was a good test for my new dragonship heat deflector. Success! It kept us toasty warm. Some next-block neighbors were having a yard party with much carousing and caroling, too, so that was a nice bonus.

The finale: we had leftovers from the Eve Feast in front of Iron Man 3. It’s kind of a Christmas movie, and it had been a while, and it didn’t require a lot of mental energy. I might be the only person in the world who likes it, but I do.

And that’s a wrap on this year’s official winterfest holiday. Spouseman is gaming, the cat is in the sink playing in the dirty dishes (I should go roust him out) and I’m writing this in front of Spiderman: Homecoming in prep for seeing the new movie on Monday.

Until later.

Oop. Some pics from the day.

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3. Other Things Media Consumption Whimsy

Merry Eve to All

Here are Chateau Herkes, feast prep is complete & relaxation is underway.

Spouseman & I took a long walk through the neighborhood to enjoy holiday lights, the roast beast is in the oven, and we’re settled in with the 1951 Alistair Sim Christmas Carol on TV, and snax + hot cider at hand.

These are our modest holiday traditions. A couple of classic movies, and cozy time together with simple foods–ones that are easy to cook & providing of many leftovers. This year that’s ham, mashed potatoes, salad, a baked fruit dish and (of course) cookies.

Nobody has to cook tomorrow, and for days after that, we have ingredients for multiple one-pot easy meals. I mean, we still WILL cook tomorrow, but only breakfast. There will be cinnamon rolls and bacon and lots of lounging in our jammies reading books & listening to music. Another tradition.

Our seasonal purchasing & decorating were scaled back this year, due to kitten, work, pandemic, the universe and life in general. But we have our sparkly-lighted faux Yule trees, one for each floor of the house, we have lots of Christmas music, and we have new movies to watch thanks to Netflix & HBOMax.

And it all starts on the Eve. It’s been festive all day in a very quiet way.

Outdoors, there are candy cane decorations and strings of lights in the yard,  and light-up presents, too. The birds are getting extra birdseed for their holiday feast, plus some dried cranberries I found way back in the kitchen cabinet when I went rummaging after baking ingredients.

Spouseman has been downstairs most of the day enjoying the heck out of his miracle Christmas present: a PS5.

You may wonder how I scored a PS5 when they’ve been impossible to find in stock anywhere.

WELL. There’s a story, let me tell you.

TL;DR edition: I got lucky.

For months now, whenever I went onto a retail shopping site, I would throw in a a keyword search for Playstation, just on the off-chance. I got to know all the various messages of disappointment, from “Out of Stock” & “Currently Available” to “Entry will be active when stock is received.”

I was combing sites for Covid rapid tests after Thanksgiving and did my usual, “Enh, I’ll do a lookup,” and instead of one Out Of Stock entry on Costco dot com, there were unexpectedly TWO.

Curiosity is not my middle name, but that was a puzzle, so I clicked the unexpected second entry and LO, THERE IT WAS!  THE “ADD TO CART” BUTTON WAS LIVE!

Now, I wasn’t entirely sure the listed PS5 was the right version, and it came with accessories I wasn’t sure Spouseman needed, but friends, I tell you I have never clicked through a sale faster.

And after I took a screenshot of the confirmation and got the email, I told Spouseman. Because some things make good surprise presents, and some are so exciting they need to be shared right away.

OK, maybe it isn’t much of a story. But it arrived in three days, and Spouseman has been playing happily on it all day, and that makes me happy.

ANYway.Other highlights of this Eve:

All the things had to be chopped, sliced, mixed, mashed or otherwise cooked ahead are set for today & tomorrow.

Cookies have been baked.

Mr Pips halped with food prep & looked cute sleeping on his high chair. Now he’s crashed on the couch next to me.

I’ve watched all three Princess Switch movies. Silly, cheesy, lighthearted fun.

There was napping near the Christmas tree.

And this marks the second day off social media. It isn’t a long time, but it feels WEIRD not to be tossing my random thoughts onto Facebook and/or Twitter all day long.

Freeing, but weird.

That tells me I’m doing the right thing. It shouldn’t feel weird to be fully present in my own life.

And on that note, on screen Little Tim is behaving himself in church, Ebenezer Scrooge will be getting a big scare from Christmas Yet To Come very soon, and it’s time to for me to sign off.

Have a Merry Christmas, or a merry weekend, whichever. May it be full of happiness and free from stresses. May you have many books to read, and plenty of time to enjoy them.

Until later!

Categories
3. Other Things Media Consumption Writing Life

Post-Thanksgiving Post

No worries, this isn’t a long, rambling post listing all the people I’m thankful to know, the experiences I’m grateful I’ve had, or all the physical & tangible things I’m privileged to have in my life. I’ll save that post for the alternate reality where I become hugely famous and have to give a thank-you speech in front of a live studio audience after I receive a Lifetime Achievement Award. Or something like that.

This is more like a school report on How I Spent My Weird American Holiday Thursday.

Spouseman & hibernate on Thanksgivings. Lots of reasons–for the longest time, we had no other close family in the same state, and/or the day was my single breather between 6 weeks of frantic retail holiday prep and 6 weeks of frenzied retail holiday shopping, neither of us enjoy large gatherings much…the list could go on, but ANYway. It’s just not a holiday we’re comfortable “celebrating. It has a huge identity crisis and a bunch of unpleasant cultural baggage attached. What is the day dedicated to? Pilgrims? Mayflower? Ugh, no, thanks. Gratitude? For what? Everything? <waves vaguely>

Attending mandatory large family gatherings with hefty dollops of guilt & stress, getting excited about overreating, watching NYC parades & regional football games, and plotting huge consumer spending sprees are strange traditions, that’s all I’m saying. I don’t know how most of those things are even related to gratitude, but I suspect television marketing may be involved.

BY THE WAY, DID YOU KNOW THE UNITED STATES USED TO JUST THROW “DAYS OF THANKSGIVING” ALL WILLY-NILLY, LIKE, JUST FOR JOLLIES, WHENVER THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT FELT SOMETHING NICE HAD HAPPENED WORTH CELEBRATING WITH A DAY OFF? WE DID!

(Okay, there’s lots more to it, but my point is, “National Day Of Thanksgiving” didn’t start off having ANY association with harvests, bad colonialist propaganda or lies about Pilgrims, much less the whole family, food, & football traditions. Here’s a nice explainer from last year: https://billmoyers.com/story/a-national-day-of-thanksgiving/ if you’re interested.)

But. I. Digress.

In this household, the only tradition of the third Thursday in November is that I cook a lot of food that goes on steep sale this time of year, Spouseman washes a lot of dishes, we eat some tasty treats but not so much we feel sick, we game or read or watch something fun, and then we enjoy not having to deal with any complicated meal prep or food shopping for at least a week. Yay!

Here are some pics from this year’s Kitchen Fun part of the day.

Everything on the plate was from scratch this year. I even made cranberry sauce from scratch for the first time (cranberries were SO CHEAP OMG) I have a soft spot for the canned gelatinous goop, and by ignoring half the recipe instructions I was able to make mine gelatinous & goopy but nicely tart, too. It’s a big win & will be repeated.

I forgot to take a picture of the mashed potatoes in their gallon container, but tbh those don’t present well except on a plate anyway. Spouseman said he liked the rolls best because they were small & cute. They were also a late addition to the menu. It’s the world’s easiest bread recipe, quick & fun to make.

Here’s a pic from the relaxation part of the day.

Pip is good at modeling proper relaxation.

We’re re-watching Great British Baking Show from the beginning because it’s relatively wholesome & brainfree, and I’m reading Sherry Thomas’s Lady Sherlock series, also a book called Naked Statistics that I somehow missed back when it first came out. And I’m playing on the computer, and Spouseman is getting in a lot of gaming time. Today is day two of all that fine action, with a full weekend of more ahead. It’s what we do. Shopping? THIS weekend of all weekends? OH, HELL NO.

And that’s my annual Thanksgiving post. If you’ve gotten this far, I would like to use this excuse to issue thanks in print to all you wonderful people who read my blathering here, who recommend, gift, and review my existing books, and who offer continued patient encouragements to me during this ongoing, glacial, writing-the-next-book phase I’m still slogging through.

(I think that was a proper sentence. I’m not going back to change it. ANYway.)

That’s all for now. Until next time!

Categories
3. Other Things Whimsy Writing Life

holiday tradition: introvert edition

Christmas & New Year’s at Chez Herkes are pretty simple: our house is an Introvert Haven on both the Eves and the Days.

How does that work? Well. Spouseman works on jigsaw puzzles or Legos or plays video games, I watch movies, play with the train set, put up ornaments (yes, I often wait until Christmas Eve to do the tree)  and putter around the kitchen when I’m not curled up on one of the bean bags with a new book to read or puttering with the book I’m writing at my desk.

AND we’re open to friends dropping by any time after 7PM on the Eves and after 1 PM on the Days.  (Always wise to inquire if we’re on a walk through the neighborhood to admire holiday lights or get fresh air, but other than those excursions, we’re IN.)

Nothing is going on, but company is welcome. That’s it.

There are non-traditional holiday movies on the television in one room all day & night (for several years we did a Bad Movie double feature on NYE, but it got awfully organized and was causing me unfun panic and so it was retired in favor of more Introverting In Company like we already did on Christmas.)

ANYway. There’s usually quiet music in the non-television room, and there are comfy chairs available for sitting with snacks and beverages pretty much everywhere because that’s how I roll. And of course there are foods and beverages for snacking. Because for me holidays mean food, and food is yummy.

Zero planned activities, zero zero formal socializing. Conversation and catching up are cool, just not…required. Quiet parallel play like reading, crafting, surfing the internet via phone or tablet, or watching television–that’s as close as things get to a theme.

The new house give us SO MUCH MOAR SPACE to stretch out! I can’t wait to holiday here.

Friends whose holiday travels bring them past our road less traveled on their way over the river and through the woods are welcome to drop by for a mug of cider (or a beer or wine or a cuppa hot tea) Settle in for awhile or just decompress for a the length of a nosh and a sip. Some years we have several drop-ins, many years it’s just Spouseman & me, but always, it’s simple, and nerdy.  (see below)

Happy Hibernation season, everyone!

Categories
Detours Writing Life

Hibernation Alert

Image by Melanie von Gunten from Pixabay

I’m indulging myself with a post on a topic I like to call, “Weird things about me it’s useful to know.” I’ve been clicking “follow” and “friend request” on social media quite a bit of late, so it might be relevant.

Today’s topic: seasonal hibernation.

From mid-November through mid-March-ish I become a sleepy, grumpy cat who lacks the strength needed to maintain a Public Face and handle Other People. I don’t actually sleep more, but I have to warn y’all, I do pull away from the everyday world.

A similar retreat predictably happens in early summer, so it isn’t a light-related thing. Nor is it a bad thing. It’s simply a cycle I’ve noticed. I have energy phases. Not ups & downs so much as shifts between outward-tolerance and inward focus.

This inward phase starts around Halloween, and I’m in full retreat-to-the-den mode now.

This is blog-worthy for two reasons.

1. Buffering.  I never want friends to feel neglected, but my emotional tank drains and freezes. Simple activities that come more easily during other months (never easily, let’s face it, I’m profoundly introverted and let’s not even mention the anxiety) take me ten times longer to accomplish and take ALL my energy.

I’m talking little things like reaching out and making phone calls or sending messages. Things like responding to emails, texts, or social media. Important, adulting, professional things. Necessary-to-modern life things. Yeah.

Conservation gets me through. I limit or put off outside obligations until the season turns and I come ’round face to the world again, about the time crocuses open to greet the returning sun. This allows me to devote my small energies to stuff like washing, dressing, creative projects and research. I do my best research in January. ADHD hyperfocus FTW.

Also I ramp up activities like baking (SO MUCH BAKING) blogging like this, decorating my space with sparkly brightnesss & color & coziness, and so on. Nesting, denning, hibernating things. Wrapped-up-in-me things.

Is it selfish of me to go dark in The Giving & Socializing Season? Yeah, I’ll cop to that, but self-care isn’t only a buzzword.  Gotta put on my oxygen mask if I’m to be any good to others…

…because the OTHER thing I’ve noticed is that if I fight this deep-rooted need for quiet downtime, if I pour energy into Pretending Normal and Performing Enjoyment through the gray of winter, an emotional crash-and-burn of epic proportions WILL follow.

NO THANK YOU.

Which brings us to the second reason I’m bothering writing about this:

2. Boundaries. Guilt trips do not motivate me, but every so often someone treats clearly-defined requests for space as a challenge to be overcome with shaming, or they interpret low enthusiasm for their <insert personal topic here> as a value judgment or a failure to care enough about them. Friendship bridges have burned over this.

I’m hoping this forthright admission now will prevent misconceptions later. So.  If you didn’t know this about me, now you do.

Important caveats:

A. My online presence may appear to contradict what I’m saying here. That’s not ideal, but that’s a professional obligation as well as a personal pleasure, so I ALWAYS scrape up new posts and (nearly always) manage to reply to direct contact. (NOT FB Messenger. Sorrynotsorry.)  I lean hard on memes, GIFS, and my habit of sharing random sock & lunch pics. (BECAUSE WHY NOT? I LIKE FUN SOX.)

B. Needing to be quiet and unsocial is NOT the same as wanting to be alone.  Even when I am a sleepy, grumpy cat, I love being around people doing things.  From a corner. Watching.

Having good friends in my Nice Quiet Space, hanging out doing their own Nice Quiet Things. (Or Nice Loud Things, as long as I don’t have to be loud too) is the absolute BEST. I mean, then I can feed people, and that energizes me. Super-best is when they invite themselves over so I don’t have to spend energy to reach out.

But I will invite as much as I can, and I will NEVER be hurt by declined invitations. I grok needing bubble time.  Second best is when I get invited to other spaces by people who make it explicitly clear it’s okay for me to lurk in corners and not stay long.

C. Communication is the most stressful part. I do a fairly good job of faking people skills, but it’s ALWAYS an exhausting job that requires constant mental processing and accessing memorized talking templates while monitoring a bunch of verbal and non-verbal feedback loops to assess efficacy. Example below:

 “Did I react appropriately to that exchange of information, why did they shake their head at what I said, what does that expression mean, they said a nice thing but the tone doesn’t match,  why is that posture vibe scraping my nerves, was that a rude comment, was I too loud, too abrupt, what does that smile mean in this situation…aaaggghhh!!!”

Yes, that is what conversations are like for me. Yes, every conversation. Even ones I enjoy with people I love. Multiple channels running all the time, and a lot of saved verbal scripts used. So I guess that’s a whole ‘nother Weird Karen Thing. Point is, it’s never an easy haul, and in the cold midwinter I don’t have the mental muscle to power through much of it.

ANYway.

That’s all there is for now. Next post will be about baking again. Or maybe about more weird stuff. Time will tell.

Happy hibernation, everyone.

Image by Melanie von Gunten from Pixabay