Do I have to do this?

cat-390496_1920It’s late. I worked hard on a mentally and physically draining tasks all day, then drove  in the pitch dark and fog to and from a long final session in a class on garden design. I’ve filled my empty belly with pizza and put on my fleecy jammies, and I’m exhausted. My topic is “Have To versus Get To.” Oy. It’s a tough nut to crack on a brain made squishy by carb overload. Blah.

I could always not write the post.

Which does bring me to the point in my usual roundabout way. I don’t have to do any of this arting. I don’t have to write. I don’t have to make pretty pictures with my words and other peoples’ images, much less with words and images that sprang from the hearts of others. I don’t have to work into the wee hours days in a row to build an author website. No one in the world is clamoring for these things.

And let’s face it, a lot of the work is sheer drudgery with all the exciting appeal of sorting buttons.

So why do them if I don’t have to?

Because doing them brings me more joy than not doing them. Because solving puzzles and mastering new skills wakes up my spirit and energizes me. Because discovery is a miracle. Because the results of creation–even the flawed, lumpy practice results, even the ugliest of thumb pots and crookedest of seams–are worth all the raw, painful frustration that drags along in the wake of every learning journey.

That’s why. That, and it gives me the opportunity to mash up and mutilate some awesome metaphors. I get to do this art gig. My choice. My present to myself. It’s a priceless gift. That’s a good thing to remember now and then.

Time: 10:10PM
Tea: Raspberry Herbal (because it’s late)
Steep time: 8 min